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Location: UFOUpDatesList.Com > 2007 > Aug > Aug 1

Bat Boy You Will Be Missed

From: UFO UpDates - Toronto <ufoupdates.nul>
Date: Wed, 01 Aug 2007 08:28:01 -0400
Archived: Wed, 01 Aug 2007 08:28:01 -0400
Subject: Bat Boy You Will Be Missed

Source: The Attleboro Sun Chronicle - Attleboro, Massachusetts, USA


Monday, July 30, 2007

Bat Boy, You Will Be Missed
Tom Reilly

The news hit this reporter like a crashing UFO (piloted, of
course, by Amelia Earhart.)

The Weekly World News (official motto: "The World's Only
Reliable Newspaper" - no really) is ceasing publication.

I blame the aliens.

Because where else except in this publication are you going to
read about what the aliens are up to? For example, in this
week's issue is the shocking story of a man who's being harassed
by extraterrestrial telemarketers, in clear violation of the
national "Do Not Call List." (Headline: "ETs phone his home.")

But we are getting ahead of our story.

Last week, American Media Inc., the Boca Raton, Fla.-based owner
of a number of weekly tabloids, announced that Weekly World News
would fold after 28 years of printing headlines about sightings
of Elvis, Hitler, JFK, Bigfoot and a race of space aliens who
worship Oprah.

According to published reports, one employee at the paper said
the staff was called into a meeting and told they would all be
out of jobs as of Aug. 3. "The reasons they gave don't even make
sense." Well maybe not in Weekly World News land, but this is a
familiar story in the rest of the publishing world..

The company, which also publishes The National Enquirer and The
Star, said that changes in the market for magazines had made
publication of WWN much more difficult. It was reported that the
company had said the circulation of the magazine had dropped to
83,000 in 2006 from 153,000 in 2004.

Now, if a newspaper that prints headlines like "Angel of Death
Visits Earth" can't maintain its circulation, what hope is there
for the rest of the print media?

I mean, for us, a sexy headline is something like "Board to mull
eyeing report." It just doesn't have the same panache.

WWN was always the poor stepchild of the supermarket tabloid
family. According to urban legend, when the Enquirer and Star
upgraded to all-color printing, the publishers started Weekly
World News as a way of getting some use out of the black and
white press equipment they still owned.

And when the other tabs switched to covering celebrity gossip,
WWN stuck to its roots with stories about Mother Nature
endorsing Al Gore for president.

But no longer. Some other publication is going to have to keep
track of those sightings of Elvis. Oh no, I forgot. After years
of reporting that Elvis was still alive, a few years ago the
paper reported that Elvis was, in fact, now dead. (Or was he?)

Ed Anger, the famously irascible columnist who used to tell
readers that he was "pig-bitin' mad," is going to have to find
another outlet for his wrath. (Fox News may have an opening.)

And how will we keep up with the exploits of Bat Boy, the half-
human, half-bat youngster discovered living underground and
later recruited to fight Osama Bin Laden because of his cave
exploring skills?

And, most importantly, what are we going to read in the checkout

Tom Reilly is a Sun Chronicle news editor. And in a shocking
exclusive, he can be reached at 508-236-0332 or at
treilly.nul At least that's what Jimmy Hoffa

Listen to 'Strange Days... Indeed' - The PodCast



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